Friday, December 7, 2012

Love circa adolescence


Maybe I missed it or never had enough time for it. I have never loved a band before, liked maybe, but love, never before. But now, post my teens, i can't just get enough of Mumford and Sons!
Lovely vocals,strong music and most importantly strong lyrics!

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Fuku

I
Recently read Junot Diaz's ' The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao". A good read, and something that I should blog about. The Dominican culture was interesting and the book itself was different in its employment of multiple narratives. However, what intrigued me most was the term 'fuku'.

II
Now this fuku thing has been making me uneasy; queasy would be the right word. It seems to fit into the circumstances of almost all of my seminar courses this year. Hopefully, it shall not remain so! Hopefully.

III
Which reminds me, [calm.com]. A big shout out to to Bhargo for tweeting about this.

Also, this I,II,III motif is something brother Amlan employs, to much better effect! Hopefully, he shall begin writing a lot, soon.


Thursday, November 29, 2012

Letting it Go


It was funny, the way it ended. Not long drawn out, neither did it snap shut altogether. She stayed on for a while, took her time and finally laid it bare. How could I do that? How could I be so insensitive? How? how?

It took a lot of courage to tell the truth. Truth be told, it was truth that did me in. Perhaps, I could have, should have and in hindsight would have told a lie. But then, trust was what I prided myself on.

In the way, maybe she is just somebody I used to know!

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Burning Bridges


It has been the weirdest in years. The motto has been 'flip flop' and the motive? Well, the motive is yet unclear. For the first time, since well the last time, and mind you, that was ages ago. Well yes, its been a long time, but finally I am reaching the point of literally saying 'Fuck you!'

Do not ask why and definitely not, 'why now'? I know bridges once burned mostly stay that way and life is perhaps too short to ever come back on this track. Believe me, I do love them, most of them anyway, but there is no other way to do this.

Hopefully they shall understand and to those who don't, well that is just how it is.



Thursday, November 15, 2012

Whore


I feel like a whore.
Well, don't get me wrong. I mean, like a book whore. All day long I log on to flipkart trying to find books, cheap ones and putting them on the backburner for later.

Anyone reading this, you know what I want!
What i have always wanted!! Nothing makes me go gaga more than a book.

I don't mind being a book whore, anyway!

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Back


I think I should move to writing something light, something fun and something that would make you laugh. True that?

It has been a long time; too long as usual. The mood is sombre and the veil has lifted to reveal the true nature of your stock. Reveal? Reveal what, you might ask? For the truth was always there for you and me to see, for the both of us to think and understand. But there was no space for thee or three.

Space? I look around the airport and wonder.
What a country, what lands; everywhere I see there is flat land, stretching right upto the horizon. Unlike kathmandu, where everything is squeezed inside those hills; even dreams, pushing and shoving to find their space among the teeming imaginations and machinations of those few who claim to have better matter; grey or white.

It does not matter anyhow, does it? So young and energetic, and who would have thought? Not me, I was never the imaginative type; give me a white canvas and the most I would come up with would be a picture of the hills and the river and crudely drawn mountains with the 'appropriate' flag on it. But he was different, unassuming but he dazzled you if you were lucky enough to offend him.

Offend? Such a casual word, and a silly one at that. Speech, sound, simulation, visuals; your morality is offended by all and sundry; much like the sick old man with the cold. Nothing cures it? Not even those traditional herbs? Take it easy macha!

Macha, what are you going on about? Perhaps you really should write something funny. This one is not quite working out.

Well on working out, take a look at this http://josefbrandenburg.com/so-what%E2%80%99s-your-excuse/

Phew!

Monday, October 8, 2012

:)



You preempt my actions and you appear even before I can think of you.

Friday, September 21, 2012

Brother



The chips are down, the spirit flagged
Certain things changed, yet, the core remains
No matter what the state
Stay the course brother
And
some day, the sun will shine
And the day shall be better
Till that day
And to that day
We clasp our hands
And walk together
Unfailing and not wavering
The spirit stands out
The spirit, brother!

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

I write





I write to write
Of those scenes
That beg to be told
I write to write
To emote
Feel and echo; 
To pinch, perceive and believe
That happy smile;
Ages ago
To remember
Those days; not sunny though
But warmth left
Much like coal of a fire dying

I write
To remind
That reflection there
On the glassy wall
That its time to go
To realise what has been left
By the inferno

I write; perhaps just to write.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

1-2-1

A sigh
An unread book 
Lies
Rotting away
For want of eyes, And
a caressing touch.
A slight raise of your eyes

Random Random lines
Nonsense....
Convenient props
And a killer byline

Same old, same old
It takes time for the flow
And you know that
It takes two to tango, Right?
That look again
You could kill with your eyes.
A few more lines
Maybe we would be ready to go?

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Road Trip - Part I


Writing is a serious exercise? Or is it?
It is not surprising to see blogs go dry once the blogger gets involved in a ‘taxing’ job, the caveat obviously being the serene joblessness college students find themselves in.

These holidays, I finally got the chance to go on a motorcycle road trip, something that was always on my wishlist. With information that the Banepa- Bardibas Highway was now finally open, I could not wait to get on the road. It was not only for fun but a purpose filled ride

 I was going to my village to meet my grandparents, whom I had not seen in quite a while. Further, the road also went through my father’s birthplace and the scene of his early schooling (Khurkot in Sindhuli district); a place where I had always wanted to go to. Now, I finally had the opportunity, and riding to Khurkot  definitely sounded better than walking for an entire day, which was the case before the opening of the 'highway'. But most importantly I wanted to feel the power and independence of a bike again.

However, I had been warned by everyone, including my father [ who usually encourages my madness] not to take this trip, as it just didn't make sense, to ride alone on an untested route. I was unwilling to listen to anyone and was raring and ready to go.

Early morning plans were ground to a halt in a perfect Nepali way, by a couple of chores, a promise, a successful petrol hunt and a punctured rear tyre.  After sewing all ends together, I finally managed to leave Kathmandu around 12: 30 in the afternoon.

A smooth 30 minutes later [ thanks to the smooth road built by the Japs], I landed at Dhulikhel for lunch with a friend. A quick grab of fried rice and lots of talking later, I left Dhulikhel exactly at 2. While being cajoled to stay for a few minutes more, I was more confident than nervous of the ride ahead.

A short change in direction [ Where I was wrongly headed towards the China border instead] put me to a slowly winding road. Traffic was mild and I was at a constant speed. Every long stretch of the road was met with a spurt of acceleration on my part, and there were quite a few ‘races’ with fellow riders. It was scenic, yet uneventful and yet nothing compared to what lay ahead. A distance of 53 kms was covered in an hour and half.

I got a call, from my frantic parents, who were worried that I had not called yet. Well, I had left home at 8 30 and by this time they must have expected me to be someway far ahead. I patiently explained the situation to them and started ahead. Khurkot was another 32 kms away.

I was unprepared for what lay ahead. The strong concrete road gave way to a ‘track’ filled with sand and dust and lots of excavators and men with yellow helmets. I knew that this section of the Highway was not yet fully constructed, but I did expect something better. Knowing very well that turning back was not an option, I forged on.

The road became a fork, with both options a terrifying slope of red mud. I looked to the one on the right, the angle was just too improbable, a touch too crazy to be the correct road ahead. Thankfully, there was a small sign that pointed towards the ‘easier’ version.

I was on a cliff and the view was great. Or was it? I am not sure, for the cliff was high and the road slippery and my concentration only on the road. I looked, once, at the view below and was astounded only to see the sheer drop and my distance from the edge. The view would have to wait. My focus was on the dirt road ahead.

I saw an excavator on the road ahead and though it prudent to follow it for the 300 metres to the rise of the hill. Finally after going through what I thought was the toughest stretch of biking, I finally stopped for tea. Sipping tea, I looked at the bike, the grime of dust on its metallic blue frame and the thin layer of dust all over me. My body ached and I knew that an entire journey lay ahead. Clearly, I had messed up my calculations, but I was still not done yet.

I asked the shopkeeper how far Khurkot was and the reply made me shudder. Another 90 minutes was what they offered. I looked at my watch which read 4 30 in the afternoon. “Impossible” , I muttered under my breath and left with a new found resolve.

Perhaps, this resolve helped me or perhaps the road just got easier but the road ahead resembled the roads of my village in the Terai. It was an easy ride with a careful eye every now and then, but still Khurkot seemed remote. Finally around 5: 30 in the evening, I sensed an increasing chill in the weather. There was a violent gust of air and I had to work hard to maintain my hold over the machine. Oh, and it had become darker too.

Finally, I reached Khurkot around 5 50 In the evening. Cold, tired and frightfully dirty; not the way I imagined, but that was how I reached my grandfather’s native place and the place where my father had his early education.

I stopped by a shop and ordered tea. The wind was howling, and I told myself not to think of anything else, especially not of the journey ahead. I started asking a few people about my grandfather and suddenly found two ‘cousins’ there. They advised me to stay and complete the rest of the journey the next day. However, I was in a hurry, to run across and to come back, and I knew I had no choice but to move on.

So exactly ten minutes later, I left Khurkot and started on my onward journey. The hills were not far off but darkness had set it and I was having a difficult time riding the bike, especially over the sudden riverbanks,  that seemed to be a partial substitute for the road. Somehow, I managed to get on the hills, a better road and the climb followed.

It was chilly, and cold and I could feel it; even upto my bones. My fingers were freezing and I could feel a slight tingling in them. I looked up at the stars and looked around, not a single light pierced the darkness. I felt alone, I knew I was alone. Various thoughts crossed my mind; was it a dream? Or was I really riding all alone, cold in the darkness with no idea of when the destination would arrive.

Sindhulimadi 10 kms. That was what the slab on the roadside read, and I was delirious with joy. Spirits rose, and I willed myself to be optimistic. I had already decided to stop at Sindhulimadi and then head for my village in the morning, and ten kilometers was really close.

I continued rising up the hill and the stated distance continued decreasing. However, I was puzzled. As far, as I know Sindhulimadi was on the valleys and not on the top of a hill and it was a district headquarter. Hence, despite the loadshedding in place, there was bound to be a few lights here and there, but there was none. I was all alone.

Finally, it hit me. I had been reading Sindhuligadi (the fort) as Sindhulimadi. I felt terribly foolish and wanted to stop for a bit but the chill at the top of the hill was unbearable. So I continued on, till I reached Sinshulimadi at around 7 20 in the night. It was dark and cold and the water was freezing, but I got access to food and a fire and after a bit of warmth, I fell asleep.

Early next morning, I left for my village, which was now a mere 40 kms away. After the early 5 kms or so through Sindhulimadi, I was shocked to see the state of the road and thanked my stars for staying on at Sindhulimadi the previous night. There was no way, I could have attempted this crossing in the dead of night. However, the road after that was thankfully much better and I reached my village around 10 in the morning.

I knew the journey was just half complete, but I vowed to return via a different route; an easier one.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Kolaveri di?

No, not the song, something else. Its been a long time...six months since my last post on this blog. To be truthful, the last year was not a good one in terms of writing; both on the blog and off it. It was sheer laziness that was responsible for the rather long hiatus, and on the other spectrum, pure rage that has pushed me to write a new post.

Forget how the year went by or what the new year resolutions were. Currently, I am in the midst of a murderous rage, despite the soulful Piya Basanti Re..blasting away on my computer. No, it is not the antagonist that has put my mind to prose, but rather than the presence of complete calm and absolute focus in the midst of the rage. To be frank, I was surprised at the peace I felt just immediately after a vitriolic outburst, akin almost to the euphoria of winning a football match. In fact, it has been a long time, too long, since I remember such complete focus and utter concentration and such rage!

Maybe, its good to have a little bit of Kolaveri, every now and then and perhaps 2012 is going to be a raging year after all!